The Feeling

There are few brief moments, with the changing of seasons, that I always want to stop and reflect and make sure my family is on the right track.
As the days get shorter, the temperatures start to drop; the windows stay open longer and I am more aware that summer is just about to close.
Cicadas are few and far between and the Owls are sounding more prominent.  Fall is not yet here, but I can feel it coming.

Now is the time when I double check my kiddos.  Their seasons are changing also, and with every changing season I realize that my kiddos become less and less "mine".  New teachers and new friends start to replace my status as "best friend" and I am happy for it because I know they are growing.

Wednesday is a day when there aren't any scheduled activities.  Dinner conversations become longer, because dinner can start later.  And nobody wants it to end because that means an earlier bedtime for extra rest.  Even though the sun has gone down and eyes are sleepy, they still want to talk and play.

There are the simple things we talk about:
who did you play with at school?
what were your subjects today?
who traded who for what silly band?
what is in your homework folder?

And then the "reallys ?!?" start to happen:
really? he broke his arm how?!?
really? who hit who?
really? you got the solo part for your musical?!?
really? you drew a picture of what?
really? you read the whole book?

And finally the never ending questions:
when can ______ come over to play?
can I call ______to see if they can play?
how long until halloween?
how long until christmas?
how long until we can spend the night at Mimi's?
how long until we can spend the night at Gma's and Gpa's?
how long until _______we get to see _______?


Then, out of nowhere, the best part of being away from my kiddos comes from out of nowhere:
"Momma, I missed you today.  I thought of you when_____, but only for a moment because I was having so much fun!'
And my heart melts.
And I am aware (knock on wood) that I am doing a good job as a mother.

I see them leave the house and I pray that they will be safe, happy, and in hands of others that care for their well being and will keep them safe while away from me.  It is a gigantic prayer, and it runs through my mind constantly until their smiling (yet sometimes, grimacing) faces look me in the eye at the end of the day.

The hugs and kisses from my own kiddos (as well as the "high fives" from their friends) received and given are stored away in my mind everytime because as the seasons change and my kiddos get older, I know that these also, will become a few brief moments.


My goal is that someday, hopefully, I will have a photo like this:

A mom who raised, well, a lot of kids (not necessarily your own, but own enough to love you)!